Final Chicago Posts and the Pro Football Hall of Fame

We had a few pics left over from Chicago that didn't make last night's post.

So here they are!

Rob finally finds the G-spot.
It has been hiding in Chicago this entire time.

Erica gives her life advice to Rob:
Don't use your banana hand to touch the apricots.

This is a teenager in its natural state.

Day 7: Chicago to Canton and the Pro Football Hall of Fame

Indiana. It's exciting.

Two minutes later somebody flushed a toilet.
Three minutes later there was a twenty-car pile up.

Ohio. They grow the farms there.

Ohio.

Toledo, Pelee Island, Sandusky.
Not really feeling that third city.

Ohio and trees.

 Below are all the photos from the Pro Football Hall of Fame

Overall, if you are in the area, it's worth seeing.

But we don't suggest making a special trip.

Official Rob and Erica Rating: Meh...

Apparently there is only one thing worth mentioning in this entire county.

500 feet?
That's like 166 yards!

An elderly man doing the moonwalk in front of the Pro Football Hall of Fame

I hear this guy was pretty good.

Guess he was.

Check out the bling!

Lots of cash in this cabinet.

I'm sensing a theme...

The only thing phallic shaped that grown men are allowed to kiss and fondle in public.

Joe Namath's Super Bowl Jersey
And apparently the artificial leg he stole from a wandering amputee.

Holy Fuck!
Dude! That''s THEE Paul Krause's jersey!
I have no idea who the loser to the left is.

Unbeknownst to most Niner fans, Alex Smith has a cousin named
W. Esson.

Otto Graham's Jersey.
Innovator of the forward pass.

A roomful of bygone football leagues.
AKA: The leagues the NFL crushed out of existence.

Steve Young in the USFL?!

Breaking the color barrier in Pro Football.

Apparently Jackie Robinson will always be remembered, but sadly these men have already been forgotten.

 And now for the ugly statues.

Leo Nomellini: First 49er ever taken in the draft.
Good call!

Jim Brown: Greatest running back in NFL history (fuck you, Emmitt Smith)

Johnny Unitas: Peyton Manning before Peyton Manning

Terry Bradshaw: Steeler and bald football analyst.

Walter Payton: Greatest all-around running back
(Seriously, look at his RECEIVING stats.)

Some old guy.
Curator said he was a decent coach.
I heard he went to San Jose State, so I took his picture.

LT! LT! LT! LT!
Not Picture Just out of the Shot: LT's bronzed coke tray and rap sheet.

For fear of having my brains knocked out, I will not mock this statue.

4 Super Bowl Titles
3 Super Bowl MVPs
Recognized as one of the three greatest quarterbacks of all time.
Married to a former super model.
The only man for whom Chuck Norris would stand aside if the martial arts master met him on the street.
(Hey, wipe that envy off your face.)

Barry Sanders: What could have been. 

Mother Christ on a Unicorn!
That's the guy from Ace Ventura!

Not bad for a back up.

Look kids! It's the guy from the football game!
Oh, and by the way, he was an actual football coach who dealt with real players.
He did not sit at home bragging to his friends that he got his custom player drafted in the first round .

Because of this man, every college cornerback for fifteen years was asked one question:
Do you think you can cover Jerry Rice?
There was no right answer.

Steeler Crap: I hear the hall has some of their players or something. 

Jim Brown:
NFL Running Back
Innovator of the NFL Onesy

NFL Helmets through the Years:
Still not protecting players.

As Bender would say, "I'll get my own championship trophy with hookers and flapjacks!"

This is either a football,
or a mutated egg.

Personal NFL Records: 4
NFL Championships: 0
Suck it, Marino.

Rice and Clark

Just by viewing this jersey you have endangered the lives of your children.

Hook me up with that farmer john football outfit to the right and let's toss the ol' pigskin around!

Jim Thorpe retrospective.

They keep this sweater behind glass
because were you to wear it,
you would be granted the power to shoot lasers from your eyes,
make large, muscular men look foolish,
and have an inordinate amount of sex.

The plaque says that Jim Thorpe is actually ENCASED in this statue.

He doesn't get out much.

Next year's SI Swimsuit collection.

The Hall of Fame comes with a practice field.
No, no one in this picture is famous.