Minnesota and the Mall of America!

Day 4: Minnesota!

Look! More straight, empty, boring highway!
After six states and careful consideration,
Erica and I have determined that 90% of the United States is like your average librarian:
flat and boring.

Holy Shit! Trees and Corn (well, baby corn.)

And yet more trees, grassland, and corn.

Ok, today the condescending shit that sits on the dashboard was nearly tossed out the window.
You make ONE wrong turn, and this thing pitches a fit and yells at you for six miles.

Minnesota River
Not Pictured: Six other rivers we crossed that looked exactly like this one.

So the next time you hear someone yelling out, "JESUS CHRIST, I'M COMING!"
remember: that person is blessed.

Oh look, Minnesota grew trees!

Happy Trees!

Here it is!
The world's largest building dedicated to spending money!

Yes, that is an amusement park INSIDE the fucking mall!

Erica and I went on this vomit inducing ride.
Straight up, straight down, pure awesome.

Not pictured:
The entire FOURTH Floor

Really?
Even the world's largest mall,
which is dedicated to swindling you out of your money,
still needs a casino?!
What, the odds just weren't in your favor quite enough
with four floors of product and an amusement park?
And apparently no matter how far Erica goes, she can't escape the damn casinos.

1. I refuse to "think happy."
2. Sponge Bob's nose is a giant penis (and good luck getting that image out of your head).